THE COVERT NARCISSIST IS A HUMAN PARASITE!

THE COVERT NARCISSISTS WHO ARE THE SONS OF OTHER COVERT NARCISSISTS ARE MORE DIFFICULT TO DEFINE INITIALLY. POST NO.5/N (A 10 minute read)

Continuing with my profiling of the male NARCISSISTS that I have known close up personally and today it is my actual NARCISSIST partner who will be revealed. I did mention his type briefly in the opening post as the boy child with the NARCISSIST parent, in his case, it was his father!

SCENARIO 2 continued: THE BOY CHILD WITH THE NARCISSIST FATHER!

Having known myself much physical punishment from a female teacher at primary school and my own mother, I was always very wary of females. I knew that females had very bad tempers and could be tremendously cruel with their choice of words. On the other hand, all the adult males that I knew at that stage of my life, were all patient, calm, friendly men who I FELT perfectly at ease with.

I did not know that men could be horribly cruel to children too! Not at that age, I did not! My NARCISSIST partner was born to the most despicable male that I have ever had the displeasure of knowing. An authentic human parasite, he was hideous and by the time that I knew him, he had long since lost his COVERT status and was so OVERTLY vicious tongued and violent with it.

That was what my NARCISSIST partner had as his first example of male behaviour. My two former NARCISSIST boyfriends could well have had a biological father like this, though they never knew who their real father was. But to actually have a character like this as your biological father and to have to live with him, is to live in permanent HELL!

LEARNING BY EXAMPLE!

It is a sad fact but true none the less, that our parents are our first example of an adult male and female relationship. You do not live in your friend´s homes and so, do not have any idea really what their parents may be like behind closed doors. Appearances can be and so often are; completely deceptive! Such was the case here!

Initially the father was completely COVERT with his NARCISSISM and what exactly do I mean by that? What that actually means, is that no one outside the family home sees this male as he really is. One face for the street and another one for the close family! My partner´s father used to say to him that, "You must be a King in your home and a B*****D in the street!"

As you can see clearly, typical NARCISSIST as he was, he was doing the complete opposite himself. Posing in the street as Mr. Nice Guy and then pouring all of his built-up venom into his children and wife on arriving home each day. It was the proverbial egg-shell living for them all.

Though it was the mother who was the primary target for him and he was terribly violent with her. My partner and his brother´s would try to intervene and plead their father to stop beating their mother. And for once, I do actually believe his version of events because they did tally with the mother´s direct refusal to speak of her husband and their relationship.

She recognized that he had a very, vicious temperament and he would push the children away from her. The sick, male parasite that he was, he wanted that woman all to himself. She was not the four boy´s mother; she was HIS mother. And he did even call her MAMA but the children called her by her name, what about that?

PAINFULLY STUNTED GROWTH!

A parasitic adult male who was jealous of the love that his wife had for her own (and his) children. That sad to say, is how a twisted male NARCISSIST´S mind works. The children were a consequence of his daily raping of his wife but they became his kicking posts and work tools too!

As a totally unskilled and unintelligent male; this man could teach his children very little. The totally unskilled and unintelligent mother, could teach them very little also. Therefore, there was no positive learning done within the home. All learning came from outside of the family circle.

Learning in itself, was not supported by this awful man and whilst my partner tried hard to achieve good results at school, he would be rubbished and belittled by his father. He would be told that he should get no fancy ideas for himself as he would have to get his hands dirty just as his father did!

All negatives; you can´t do that, you won´t be able to do that, you can´t go there, you are not good enough for that, etc.. Never encouraging, NO, the opposite, always trying to breakdown any building confidence and ridicule any attempts at academic progress. My partner, just like my NARCISSIST mother, knew that they were going to get no help from their parents!

Not only that, but they were getting their confidence levels ripped to shreds by their parents. What kind of parents did they have? More NARCISSISTS for sure. More jealous NARCISSISTS who because they had not been able to achieve anything of note, neither were they going to allow their children to believe that they could do better than their parents had.

EDUCATIONAL OPPORTUNITIES RESTRICTED!

NO, there was not going to be any possibility of attending college or sixth form and then maybe onto university. NO, it was going to be a repeat of their mother and father´s lives. Out to work at 14 years of age and become someone´s work tool for a few pennies a week, which of course, you had to hand over to your bullish father!

Who himself, worked ever less as the boys (all four of them), added their respective incomes to their mother´s!! He could now sit back and just like all parasites, fatten himself off the life energies of his family. Working hard and seeing most of your money being spent in a local bar by your father on alcohol and gambling, can only be enfuriating!

The longing to escape this domination and dictatorship that is your father´s style of leadership increases with knowledge accumulated and of course, your own friend´s examples. Not every young person had a NARCISSIST father or mother. No, of course not! And when you found that out, that was the day that you knew that you were living with a parasitic DEMON!

No, he was trying to live off you in spite of your young age. He was not ever thinking of saving money for your future opportunities to grow; NEVER! His idea of living was drinking enough alcohol to silence his inner demons for a while and play the part of Mr. Nice Guy. Later he would parasitically drink his fill of his wife and children´s positive energy and fill them with his toxic overflow.

Far from encouraging personal growth, he advocated recognizing one´s own station in life and not getting any hopes up of being able to grow beyond that level of living. Sadly, this leads to many immature young males leaving their family home prior to learning the skills of independence. But they cannot grow under their domineering father´s twisted tutorship.

So, with little preparation and very little means, these young lads begin to try and make their own way in life. Verbally sending their NARCISSIST father´s to HIGH HELL on walking out of the door and telling them that they will not be seeing them again. "I don´t NEED you anymore and therefore, I have no reason to continue absorbing your toxic S**T!" 

I WOULD NOT MIND REMINDERS LIKE THESE ALONG MY DAILY ROUTE! Photo by Dan Meyers on Unsplash.

LOFTY HOPES IN SPITE OF HUMBLE BEGININGS!

Maybe we all as young things, think that we can make our independent way in life and surely there are many of us who are perfectly capable of doing so. But at the tender age of 16/17 years old and with no financial savings to back you and no material possessions to speak of, it generally tends to be a very sparse and frugal living that is the lot of the teenager who has abandoned their family home voluntarily!

The attitude was all wrong; wasn´t it? They all had something to prove to their father´s! But what did they have to prove to their father´s? Well, they had to prove that they could all be better men than he was! They would not have to sponge off their wives´ and children´s incomes. They would be able to get good jobs and make the life for themselves that they had never known; as yet! They would not need to be human parasites!

How to make a better life for yourself of course, meant being a better person in the first place! And that was where all four of these particular sons failed. They all became copies of him because they had no qualifications to recommend them. Bit jobs and slavery became their lot and far from prove their father wrong, they actually found that in part their father did have some reason!

No, it was not easy to make a living in a big city with so much competition but of course, their false sense of pride prevented them from admitting that they were floundering in the big, wide world of independence. They could not cope. They had lost their mother at the same time as their father and she had certainly not taught them how to look after themselves!

The search for sustitute mothers began but these substitute mothers needed to be able to offer them a lift out of their ignominy. PARASITIC living was about to begin. It was the only possibility of existence that they could see for themselves. Latch onto a good woman who came from a good family and pretend to be worthy of her!

There is a brief outline of the four scenarios that I know personally and in the next post I will start to dig deeper into the actual personality traits of the NARCISSIST and how these PARASITES literally LATCH onto a suitable host. A host with the most! OH, NO! A humble little fool like their mother was not going to be good enough!

They wanted women who were working women, who could pay their way; or at least initially! They wanted women whose families had properties and financial stability. It was not ever going to be about a female´s personality and their sentiment. No, no, no, they wanted the status that her family would bring to them!

Thanking you for reading along and don´t miss the next part of my RECOGNIZING AND UNDERSTANDING NARCISSISM series. Have a great day, won´t you!