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"TO KNOW THE TRUTH, YOU HAVE TO FIND THE TRUTH, ONLY THERE DOES THE TRUTH LIE."

ON THE OUTSIDE LOOKING IN POSTS 49 - 60 : PAGE 4

FINALLY PAGE FOUR IS COMPLETE AND READY FOR USE! In this fourth page, you will find the remaining posts which were written and published in the months of February and March 2023. Those being posts no.49 - 60 inclusive. Each post includes a short summary of a chapter of my book and the photos attached. Just to remind you ALL, PAGE ONE is the list of the November 2022 posts 1 - 16 inc. PAGE TWO includes the December 2022 posts 17 - 32 inc. and PAGE THREE lists the January 2023 posts 33 - 48 inc.


THE ON THE OUTSIDE LOOKING IN RELATED POSTS. THE FEBRUARY/MARCH 2023. POSTS NO.49 - 60 inc. 


POST No. 49 - Published 3rd February 2023 (A 12 minute read)

YOU CANNOT FEEL THE VIRTUALLY REAL EXPERIENCE, YOU CAN ONLY FEEL FIRST-HAND! My elder sister had spent the last three years studying hard and had just graduated with her nursing degree. It had been a big change of route for her but she had of course, my unbending support and encouragement. She took Puppy off to New York to celebrate before beginning to work her new career. Meanwhile, me and my partner went off to Berlin to see the 2009 World Athletics Championships. I was witness to the New World, 100 metre sprint Record, as Usain Bolt passed the finish line in 9.58 seconds. A golden hour for magic, as I recall that moment in time. Tragedy came the following year with the knowledge that my beloved elder sister had breast cancer. Another athletics meeting took me to Rome and later in the year, I sadly lost my sister. And in the November of 2010, crossed paths with the pope in Santiago de Compostella, Spain. Included is a quote from my book and a photo of my Berlin 2009 t-shirt.  You Cannot Feel Virtual Reality

my 2009 berlin world athletics championships souvenir t-shirt
THE 100m MEN´S WORLD RECORD INCLUDED!

POST No.50 - Published 5th February 2023 (A 10 minute read) 

UUUUH! UNDERSTANDING SILENCE, WHAT DOES TOTAL SILENCE MEAN? I am looking at my fifty posts published and many views but no comments at all. Does no one have anything to say? Is that from poor communication skills or lack of reason for communicating? I talk too of my INFJ status and the permanent `OUTSIDER´ tag that has accompanied me always. But also my new found vindication of my own righteousness as INFJ ADVOCATE! I am right and as such, I shall carry on writing for those who will be able to understand, after all, the rest only matter because they are our obstacles to a better world. I re-analyze my reasons for starting my blog and at that moment in time, I had received 1058 views to my blog from twenty-two different countries, across the five continents. I recognize the nature of statistics and see what they could really mean. 1058 views and just 415 posts read! What did the 643 do then? And I begin giving an explanation of my post index, listing my first six posts, lest it were difficult to navigate. Also, encouraging readers to make contact through any of the three options available! The photo is of the dawn out of my window. Uuuuhm!! Understanding Silence, What does It Mean?

a pink sunrise over the mountains today
THE DAY DAWNS!
POST No.51 - Published 8th February 2023 (An 11 minute read)

MISPLACED FAITH! ARE YOU MISPLACING YOUR FAITH? That is the title of chapter forty-eight and I am digging into where we can reasonably place our faith. China´s President Xi Jinping, was one of the very few whose nation could place their faith securely in him! The Chinese response to the COVID-19 pandemic was the example for us all to follow but sadly, no other nation had the discipline, the capability or the organizational capacity. I explore how placing faith in invisible entities who never show their faces, can be the only glimmer of hope for the ignorant. We have no hope in man-kind but neither do we believe that we can bring down HIS man-made world. Man-kind and his man-made gods are the masters and obstacles of ALL who live on Earth! We must free ourselves from both! Man-kind has two heads, which one makes the rules? The photo is of another day dawning outside my window.  Misplaced Faith! Are You Misplacing Your Faith?

a cloudy sky to greet me outside today
A CLOUDY START TO THE DAY!
POST No.52 - Published 9th February 2023 (A 10 minute read). 

FLOATING INTO AN UNKNOWN FUTURE! BACK TO DRY LAND? I am letting off steam again on the eve of R-Day. Seeing how my last three years had been in preparation for this day. All at sea and plotting a plan to get back to dry land again after twenty-eight years out at sea! Suspension, rocking boats, whose hand is on the tiller? I talk too of how my old has met up with my new and my new confidante, who has become as a glimmer of light on the land for me! The photo is of my morning skyline.  Floating Into An Unknown Future!

another mainly cloudy sky outside again, will it clear up?
THE SKYLINE THIS MORNING!

 POST No.53 - Published 11th February 2023 (A 7 minute read).

SO MANY GODS! WHEN WILL WE WISE UP? The title of chapter forty-nine and I am looking at the influences of our numerous gods and the festivals in their honour, which led to hundreds of thousands of deaths during the first year of the COVID-19 pandemic. Why could we not forfeit our displays of faith? I was fortunate enough to receive my first COVID-19 vaccine whilst writing this chapter. I include a photo of my book cover.  So Many Gods! When Will We Wise Up?

the pink front cover of my first book on the outside looking in
MY BOOK!
POST No.54 - Published 13th February 2023 (A 9 minute read).

COMING FULL CIRCLE! I am reminiscing on the final stretch of ON THE OUTSIDE LOOKING IN. I had found my way up to today and recognized that I was living with a narcissist and my love affair effectively ended. I could no longer justify loving someone who was crippling me mentally and physically! I could see that I had so much to live for and that I had to banish him from my heart and mind, first and foremost, the body and soul would come later. Having resisted being pushed to suicide, I had finally found my own therapy, PEN and PAPER! There is a photo of my book.  Coming Full Circle

POST No.55 - Published 16th February 2023 (A 5 minute read)  

IT IS CINDERELLA´S LAST SEASON, FIONA IS TAKING OVER FOR NOW! I am asking myself, what is happening with this particular post as views start flooding in from all over the world! I am also lamenting my loss of eleven hours tranquil thinking and writing time per day, which has seen my progress slowed so very significantly. I am cleaning out my castle!! Rapunzel has long gone, Cinderella has followed her and Fiona has taken over from them. Sleeping Beauty will be the last to be set free. At last, I am trying to regain my space in my castle and be more assertive with my new ground gained. This is the first phase, the initial adjusting to the new situation phase but it is all part of a long-term plan! There is another photo of my book.  It Is Cinderella´s Last Season, Fiona Is Taking Over For Now!

POST No.56 - Published 20th February 2023 (A 6 minute read)

THOSE CONCLUSIONS AT LAST! How I FELT the need to do my own round-up of my piece of writing and draw my own conclusions as to what I had achieved psychologically speaking, through this year and a half of writing and seeing clearly where I had lost my way! I speak of my partner´s rubbishing of my attempts at becoming an author, how he worked so hard at belittling me that in effect, he pushed me to publishing without his knowledge. His total unwillingness to accept me as an accomplished individual person rather than his servant and source of positive energy. Draining me of my positive energy and filling me with all of his negativity!! I talk also of my epilogue and just how much I would love to hear from readers and know of their opinions! (I am still waiting for an opinion!) I share my afterword too which thanks once again Maimónides for his inspiration, more thanks for my favourite troubadour Mark Knopfler for drawing me to Córdoba and to my sometime Prince Charming partner, for taking me to Córdoba at that moment in time! There is a photo of my book.  Those Conclusions At Last!

POST No.57 - Published 24th February 2023 (An 11 minute read)

FAREWELL TO `ON THE OUTSIDE LOOKING IN´, MY VERY FIRST BOOK IS NOW ON SALE! I am looking to take some pressure off myself now with the release of my beloved first book and lament the delays and set backs in my schedule. I determine to fight for me and my future, to keep striving to gain ground lost and challenge for dominancy of myself! I talk of my new confidante and just how much lighter I walk having begun to share my truths with another human being. Having made a firm decision to expect nothing at all from anyone or anything, I have the wonderful surprise of building a good relationship based on sincerity, integrity and understanding. I speak again, of just how much I have longed for and needed, some support and encouragement for me as a valid human being but also for what I do as a valid human being. I see my life now as two halves and see where is the pivotal point. Goodbye to my book! There is a photo of my book cover.  Farewell To On The Outside Looking In!

POST No.58 - Published 28th February 2023 (A 10 minute read)

PAGES AND POSTS; WHICH IS WHICH? I begin by explaining my reasons for these pages and what they are actually for! I am continuing my clean-up of my castle  and dwelling on the transparency of the narcissist. How me and mine are living parallel existences and have no or very few, wavelengths that we can enjoy sharing. Not just with narcissists, INFJS like myself, have always had this problem, hence our solitary status and self-stimulating apptitude. My book has been delivered and I express my excitement at that happening and finish by talking of reciprocal anything and everything, any less is a waste of time. The photo is of my book. Pages and Posts; Which is Which?

POST No.59 - Published 8th March 2023 (A 10 minute read)

WINDING UP PHASE ONE! Introducing PAGE TWO and looking again at my happiness at the wide range of nations who had looked my way thus far. Suffering from narcissistic consumption as I now am, I examine the narcissist´s tactics and how their example of a husband/wife relationship, their mother and father, has become their own guide to a sentimental relationship. Because HE (father) was always a hissing, spitting, venomous toad, so too was SHE (mother) always the Cinderella. They knew no better! I need to become the script-writer of this farce as well as the director and the main character, instead of always the receiver of the age-old female role of kicking-post and general slave! I include a photo of my first book. Winding Up Phase One!

POST No.60 - Published 20th March 2023 (A 9 minute read)

THE LAST `ON THE OUTSIDE LOOKING IN´ POST! Finally I come to a close of this first phase of my blog writing and I sum up what these last four months of writing have achieved. I thank ALL of my readers over those four months and say my final farewell to my book! At the same time, I speak of these PAGES, designed to assist all new readers to find their way back to the beginning of this ON THE OUTSIDE LOOKING IN phase of my blogging! I include a photo of my book.  The Last `On The Outside Looking In´ Post!

And there you have it, my friends. The `ON THE OUTSIDE LOOKING IN´ PAGES, all four of them, which will help you find your way through my Trains of Thought. Thank you for reading.

The trail of camel footprints in the sand and the bright pink header of my first book´s front cover.
A LAST LOOK AT MY FIRST BOOK!

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